I despise the residents of my society

Like a normal day, after my college hours I was heading to my office which is about 2 to 3 minutes walk from my uni. Along the way comes a bus-stop, Thapathali bus-stop to be specific. It was too crowded as usual.

A lot of pedestrians were waiting for the arrival of vehicles to reach their destination. Office workers, college and school students and also few teachers ( I could recognize them through the ID card they were hanging around their neck), basically most of the people were literate.

Among them was a physically challenged woman who was struggling to find a way out in that crowd. She was visually impaired. Anyone could make it out and her only helping hand was her cane.

I was about 10-15 steps behind and was trying to reach out to help her but the struggle was real. It was difficult for me to reach to her. I could see people gazing at her with the looks of confusion and sympathy. But none could take a step ahead to help her. Pathetic, isn’t it!? What would you do if you were there? Would you puzzle yourself in thoughts about helping her or not or just go ahead and do what you have to do without having a second thought about it? Right now you might be saying yes, I would help, I mean who wouldn’t, but trust me in the real scenario people tend to act different. All their words are rarely brought into practice.

Well I do not say that there was none willing to help. Yes, there was this little boy reaching out his hand to help her walk easily. Innocence of a child, well that did not last longer. It’s heartbreaking to tell you that he could not do what he wanted to, because his mother pulled him to walk faster to get in the bus. (They might have been late for something, never mind.)

So finally, I came closer to her while she almost tripped off in a puddle. Luckily, I happened to save her from falling and hurting herself. Yes, I know it sounds like a bollywood movie scene but that is what happened. Then I  asked her, “Where do you need to go?” She replied, “Lagankhel.” So I waited with her holding her hand trying to help her get a seat in the vehicle.

You might be thinking , ok now she could get in the bus and go safely. Well you are wrong there. You might have noticed seats reserved for women, disabled and old aged people in public vehicles. I did to and thinking that I thought she could get one easily and can reach where she wants to go.

To my surprise one after another micro buses came along all people started rushing as if it was some kind of race and within a minute or so it was heavily packed. Yet, I requested the conductor and the driver to manage seat for that lady but none did. The traffics were chasing the vehicles, whistling hard asking them to move faster. I felt so bad thinking that she might have to go with this everyday and who counts how many times a day. Damn it!!

To add up, one of the driver asked to come few steps ahead signalling that the seat will be managed. And fuck that driver by the time I walked 2 steps with her, he drove off in no time. Even till now nobody, literally nobody came up to help. Everyone was seeing it all, they could have took a step back and helped her get in first, but no, our society is filled with social sites freak who only tend to click pictures and posts them so that they can get notifications of “RIP”, “So sad to hear that” comments in their posts. Their mind can never be broadened enough to do something beyond that. I despise the residents of this society who belong to that category.

Finally, one micro came which was quite empty and the bus-stop was less crowded everyone had left by then. So I finally managed to get her in the vehicle in the front seat of the micro and she bid a farewell by saying, “Thank you”.

I felt  a bliss after hearing those two words. After requesting the driver to help her reach to Lagankhel, I finally continued my walk to my office.


I am writing this because I wander how many people really stand up for someone. Someone who is in real need of help. It is really disheartening to witness such literate people ignoring such incidents. Those profit-based service providers refusing to provide proper service and playing with someone’s sentiments. Such little things matters if not to you to the person you are offering help to.

I just want to request to whoever is reading this today, if you ever get a chance to help someone do not be that stupid literate fool, instead take a step ahead to create an example. It starts from you and it starts now, right from this moment.

Thank you!


(The conversation was held in my native language – Nepali.)


 

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Suicide

Hey guys, today I am going to talk about a really sensitive topic, which people tend to ignore or neglect until the occurence of some mishaps. So the topic is Suicide. Actually, I wanted to write about this since a long time but I had to find a really nice way to present this and leave a positive impact on people.

I have finally prepaed this post, so let’s get started:


As per the wikipedia, Suicide is defined as ” the act of intentionally causing one’s own death” and there can be various causes to persuade one to reach to that point.

Since the past few months, there has been a rapid increase in the number of suicide cases. The bizzare thing about suicide is while one chooses to finish his/her life to end the pain, he/she is actually transmitting that pain to someone who really cares about the person.

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Well if you are feeling suicidal and reading this right now, you might think that nobody cares about you or it is not gonna harm anyone and all that you just read is bullshit. Well, that’s not true! I believe that there is no individual in this whole world who is unloved or not worthy of being cared.
You need to know that as the persona, it differs from one individual to another how they choose to show the love and affection. Some might shout at you to make you aware of the bad friend circle while some can talk to you in a nice way for the same case. While some might threaten to leave you if you don’t quit your bad habits, while some can stick to you 24/7 to ensure you don’t get habituated to it again. All I am trying to say is, people have their own ways of communicating and showing their care. We should be able to see the motive behind their talks and actions rather than comparing them to someone else or your fantasies of how situations should have turned out to be and make an unfavourable conclusion.

Any situation should be analysed and thought through accurately so that you do not end up howling about every little things and bottle up a lot of negativity within you for no reason. Positive and negative stuffs should be distinguished carefully while your mind is at peace. That’s why people say that, hasty decisions will only lead one towards great trouble.

As I said earlier, there are many reasons for attempting to end self: depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia. These are mental health  condition which can be fought and are defeatable. It is basically found to have started from the smaller stuffs.

If you are one of the person who thinks that you do not have any interesting factors in your life: like you are not lucky, anything you try doesn’t work at all, your parents are always complaining about your studies and how irresponsible you are, or if you are a graduate and choose to stay home all day: the relatives complain about your career, your crush not responding to your texts, people commenting on your size/ height/ color or anything that is troubling you which you do not open about with people, willing to help then that is when it all piles up deep down to your heart and starts creating venoms to poision you to death.

Yes, if you take it lightly and choose a positive way of dealing it alone then that’s good too, you do not necessarily need to open about every stuffs. Unless you are a person who has started doubting about your worth, and feel like you are drowning inside with loneliness and start crying out for little or no reason at all, then you should seek out for help. It is high time you do. And trust me it is not a bad thing to be depressed or ask help for mental health conditions. If you think that people around you would not understand about how you are feeling then, do not forget that there is always a professional just a step ahead, waiting for a knock at their door.

You might be thinking, that why is she talking as if she is an expert! I  know I am not a psychologist or some research expert. I just wanna be a helping hand to end this devastating issue which seems to have spread as a trend in today’s world. Above that, I believe that one does not need a degree or some special courses to save a drowning soul.

So if you want to help someone who is suffering inside or if you yourself are, then here are few tips that can help you stabilize your mind and heart and ultimately free your soul from cynical impacts.

  • I understand that, it’s not always possible to prevent suicidal thoughts, but keeping your mind healthy with regular exercise, healthy eating and maintaining friendships can help you cope better with stressful or upsetting situations.
  • If someone is feeling suicidal, then encourage them to talk about their feelings, ask questions without making them more irritated. Do not just leave by saying that it happens to all, do not rush so fast to make a judgement cause you will only push them farther from you. Listen to them carefully and provide suggestions without making them feel inferior.
  • If it is you that need help, think about the first five closest people who have always stood by you and then go and talk to them about what you are going through. They will surely stand by you.
  • If suicidal risk is high or severe, make sure guns, knives, drugs and other harmful substances are out of reach and do not leave the person alone in any circumstances.
  • Suggest or take an appointment with a psychiatrist, if you feel it is really needed. No need to be ashamed of it cause extreme emotional pain and distress is not a sign of an mental illness. And it is better to seek help than ending a life, isn’t it?
  • Make a safety plan and continue your support/ keep sharing your feelings to your closed one (if it is you) over the long haul.

Things that you are not supposed to do with a suicidal person:

  • Argue.
  • Act shocked when they share their feelings.
  • Give promising advice. One needs to understand, how badly the person might be hurt and your confident promises if not fulfilled might break them into more peices.
  • Do not blame yourself, if you are unable to fix their problem. Instead ask for professional help. While doing this you might have to break your promise of keeping their problems as a secret. But what needs to be done for betterment cannot wait longer, right?!

Lastly, I wanna mention that certain series or movie can depict how people end their life on what terms and conditions, like for example: 13 reasons why. I want you to be aware that such film clips might sometimes show relevant stuffs while most of the time they are just exaggeration in order to make business. So, one should not be moved or be influenced by such reel events and make hasty decisions in real life.

Because everyone is precious in their own way and so is your life and ending it would not be a right decision no matter what the reason is.


Thank you, so much for sticking upto this last line, I hope I was able to make a point. If you like it or think that it could be helpful for someone, then do share and help to create a suicide free society.

Let’s go by the quote, “Happy Soul for a Happy Living”!!